I want
to address the question, “How can we raise godly daughters in a sexually sinful world?”
Even though, the sin twisted mind of society is attacking our sons too, I want
to specifically address the dangers of our daughters growing up in a sexually
minded generation. (I may address our sons in another sitting).
As a
mother of a 19 year old daughter and a Pastors Wife that has worked with teen
agers for many years, I can assure you, our teens of today have sexual
immorality in their face DAILY! They can’t escape it, it can be found on the
television sitcoms, it is on the movie screens, it is sung about on the radio
and it is all up and down your teens school hallway and on their social media!
Teen
sexuality is no longer a topic that we can sweep under the rug and not talk
about. Last year a survey was conducted among U.S. high school students:
- nearly 50% surveyed had already been sexually active.
- 34% of those had been active within the past 3 months.
- and 40% of those being active sexually did not use protection the last time they had sex.
- 15% of those surveyed have had sexual intercourse with 4 or more partners already.
As a
mother of a teen girl, these statistics are heart wrenching. The statistics of
the consequences of such behavior is just as startling…
- An estimated 8,300 young people between the ages of 13-24 have reported to be HIV positive in the previous year. (in the U.S.)
- Nearly half of the 19 million reporting NEW sexually transmitted diseases (STD) are among young people ages 15-24 years old.
- More than 400,000 teen girls aged 15-19 years old gave birth last year.
With
numbers like these, (that are steadily going up), it is no longer acceptable to
hand our daughters a pamphlet and hope for the best. We must get in their
world, get in their face and tell them the dangers of living in a sexually
immoral world.
It use
to be that we could protect our girls from the dangers of sexual sin by keeping
them under lock and key. Monitoring who she spends time with and only allowing
friends to come over when you or an adult were present. That is not enough
anymore! Because as soon as you walk out of the room or send her to her
bedroom, the allure and temptation of teen sexuality is at her fingertips, it is
called her “smartphone”. Technology has made it easy for our daughters to
become victims of sexual sins:
SEXTING…
if your daughter has a smart phone with a camera, she has the ability to send
provocative pictures of herself to others, usually boys and sometimes grown
men. And males can send her naked pictures of themselves as well, all without
your approval or knowledge. Sending sexually explicit pictures via your phone
is called “sexting” and about 40% of today’s teens have sent sexually
suggestive messages to others. Statistics show that 17% of those whom receive a
sexting message will share it with others, and 55% of those will share it with
more than one person. Sexting is no longer a topic that parents can ignore. Our
daughters are being exploited right under our noses!
SNAPCHAT…If
your daughter is taking a lot of “selfies”, no doubt she has a SNAPCHAT
account. Snapchat is a social media trend that allows you to share a picture
with someone for just a few seconds and then it disappears. Sending funny faces
is not all that this is used for. Teens are sending naked pictures to one
another with the thought that it can only be viewed for a few seconds. Our
daughters may be pulled into the thrill of this, to send a sexy picture of
herself, so to feel accepted or wanted. However, 3 dangers of this that she may
not be aware of...
#1. The sensual pictures that she snaps to a boy is a turn on
to him, it starts his engine and he will come back for more. The wrong message
sent will in turn have porn links sent to your daughter. (I personally know “church”
boys who have done this)
#2. The sexy picture your daughter has sent may only
be viewed for a couple seconds, however, the receiver has the ability to do a “screenshot”,
which then saves the picture on their phone or computer.
#3. Snapshot
administrators have the right to any of your pictures, even though the picture disappears
after a few seconds, they have it in their master file. *Nothing shared on the
web is private, keep that in mind.
Some snapchat
stats to consider:
- 400 million snaps are sent a day.
- 2% of all college students use snapchat to specifically send “sexts”.
- 4.6 million snapshot users had their personal info leaked to the internet in 2014.
OTHER
SOCIAL MEDIA…” Sexting” and “Snapchat” is just a couple ways that the immoral
sexual society is snagging our daughters. Your daughters are also being bullied
and manipulated on other social media such as Facebook, Twitter, Scout, Tinder,
Vine, Kik and Fling. All of these media’s are pulling our daughters away from
the value and respect that God intended for our little girls.
So what
can we do?
First
of all, we must lead by example. If you want your daughter to dress modestly,
you dress modestly. If you don’t want your daughter to watch shows with sexual
suggestions, you don’t watch it.
Secondly,
we must teach our daughters to have self respect and self worth. She is
bombarded with a world that says eat this, wear that, become this, stay away
from that. We must teach our girls that it is not about the outer appearance
but the inner that counts. God looks at the heart and His approval is the one
she needs. Self worth cannot be found in looks, or accomplishment or whom you date,
self worth can only be found in Christ!
Thirdly,
it is imperative that we offer our daughters an alternative to the world’s view
of sexuality. Refute myths about sex with the truth. We, as mothers, must be
the primary source of information about sexuality. Offer a lot of accurate
information, refute the common myths such as “everyone is doing it”, “it’s not
sex if you don’t go all the way” or “it is alright when you love each other”. Don’t
be afraid to share the scary statistics and most important, show her what the
Bible says about being pure and that God designed sex to be between one man and
one woman when they become married. Today’s society has stripped away the
beauty that God designed sex to be. We must teach our daughters that God will
reward them for being pure with their bodies. God knew the heartache that would
come if we would give pieces of our heart away instead of preserving our whole
heart for that one that He designed for us.
It is
difficult to raise godly daughters in this sinful world, but when we speak up
and take a stand, I believe that our godly daughters can change their
generations thinking of what is acceptable and what is not.
But, we
must first educate them and also educate ourselves.
“Training
us to renounce ungodliness and wordly passions, and to live self-controlled,
upright, and godly lives in the present age.’ –Titus 2:12
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